.....from this hypocrisy & pretence......
What if this isn't everything it should be????

I'm not even sure how I feel....!! !!

Maybe somewhere, someone loves me so much;
He'd share his life with me and my whole life he'd touch;
Maybe somewhere, someone longs to hear me call;
Or maybe, yes, I realized, maybe there is none at all...

Would you like to follow me???

Find my PAGE on facebook, where again my thoughts are my words.. :)

Set me free...!!!

| Saturday, October 15, 2011
Pia used to talk about her secrets and the guy she loved to the pair of love birds she had at home.They were her so-called pets, but she considered them more than family.She pretty well understood the fact that they were meant to be free and she couldn't really see them in the cage all the time wishing to fly and soar high up in the sky....

She couldn't live without those two innocent birds, who heard everything she had got to say.They did not question her, judge her or leave her.They had been with her through EVERYTHING.They were just the same since the moment she had them.It often made her sad that they were trapped within the closed bars of the cage.She always thought to herself-"Some day I shall leave you free.I'm sorry"....

She knew what it felt like to be trapped. She was herself trapped inside the cage prepared by God within the bars of destiny and fate.

Pia did not have many friends because of her reserved and introvert nature.She had not told any of them about Abhay 'cause she was not sure of his feelings and there was a constant insecurity biting her.She was scared of being heart broken once again.

Abhay was the sweetest guy she had come across.He was patient,truthful,decent and frank.They hadn't really shared any secrets as such, but they were good friends.
He was exactly like the guy Pia craved for. She loved him more than herself.It would be exaggeration perhaps, but she could cross the seven seas for him if it had not been for her over protective and caring parents. She could write volumes of books about Abhay.

Pia could not really make up her mind about asking Abhay about his feelings with the fear of being rejected.
Nevertheless, she could not take the silence any more.
She decided to tell him about her feelings before it was too late.
She called him up and asked him if he could meet.Abhay was a bit hesitant first, but then he agreed.
They were supposed to meet in the evening at 5 o' clock sharp. Both were punctual and true to their words,so there was no question of the meeting getting postponed or cancelled.Pia was anxious.She checked her facebook notifications which were usually "0" because she hardly used facebook but she made a point to check his profile every now and then.Madly in love that she was!!!!!!! :)

She got ready, took out her cell phone from the charger pin, informed her mom about it and left for CCD as per the venue decided.
Pia was dressed in a red top with  jeans as she knew red was Abhay's favorite color.
Abhay reached the place in a dark blue tshirt with denim jeans.
They wished each other and sat down on the comfortable couch.
After few seconds of silence......Pia told him :- "I am sorry I called you to meet on a short notice.I wanted to meet up and talk.I know this is awkward.....buu..t..."..
Abhay interrupted her."Hey Pia!It's absolutely fine.Tell me whatever you want to say.I'm all ears"...
Pia hesitated for a moment and then said "Abhay, actually I don't know what would you react to this or what you would think about me after knowing this.It's just that I want you to know this."
Abhay said "Piaaaa..please stop adding to the suspense.You're quite straightforward and so am I.I don't understand puzzles and riddles.Say it clearly.What's the matter with you?"
" you a lot."...she said!
Abhay was dumbstruck hearing this.He was just a good friend.How could he even think of Pia that way..
Pia continued.."No sorry..I think I should rephrase that..I LOVE YOU"..
Abhay tried to explain her---"Look Pia...I respect your feelings.I like you as a friend.You're an amazing girl.Very sweet,caring,mature and simple.You're like the girl every guy wants.But somehow I'm not ready to be in a relationship.I'm not strong enough to fight for you.I don't think I deserve you.I'm not the right guy for you"...
Pia was shattered and smashed!!!!!!!
She gathered some courage and said "But Abhay....why not?...?"
Abhay told her "Pia...Sorry I never told you...I was in a relationship.I don't really trust love anymore.I know all are not the same.You could actually prove to me that love does last forever.But Love for me *SUCKS*.Novels and quotes say 'Love is beautiful.Absence of love sucks'..Well,I've never seen the beauty of love.I have only seen it hurt people and break people!I don't know if I'm doing this right,but this is what I presently feel.I'm sorry to put you through this.I need some time perhaps...some time alone with myself to introspect my mistakes and my past."
Pia was left speechless.She quietly left the place without any expression and without uttering a single word of remorse,regret or anger.

She went back home.She pretended to smile,laugh with her parents and behaved like everything was normal.She made up a farcical display of being fine,when inside she was breaking down wanting to scream at the top of her voice.She was realizing within herself how much she could endure.It was like God was testing her strength.

She was awake the entire night with tears in her eyes and no one to wipe her tears. She saw her love birds' living the restless night.It was at that time she realized how much they needed to be free...
She penned down a few words in that hurting loneliness

"There is the moon,there are stars,there are trees,there are flowers;To listen to my words and see my tears.
The only thing missing is our moments and You..."

At dawn before anyone could question her, ask for any explanations she opened the door of the cage and left the birds where they were rightfully meant to be...!!!!!

She had lot of grief within but she was happy she could set the birds free before it was too late.Finally that someday had come! :)

She truly got the meaning of the lines:-

"If you love someone,set them free...If he comes back to you,he's yours.If he doesn't,he never was"

2 opinions:

{ chirag } at: Sunday, October 16, 2011 said...

nice one disha.
it was gud

{ Where thoughts are Word$ } at: Sunday, October 16, 2011 said...

Thanks a lot Chirag!!! :)


Copyright © 2010 Where thoughts are Word$ Blogger Template by Dzignine